Where is Home?

Gurvinder Singh
2 days ago
2 min read

Updated: 14 hours ago

A girl had broken my teenage son's heart. He came home looking devastated.

His mother took one look at him and understood that all was not ok. Without saying a word, she just hugged him. He broke down and sobbed his heart out. Even though it took him a long while to get over her, the healing started with that hug.

Once, whilst travelling outstation, I fell seriously ill. Neither my self-medication nor the doctor's treatment provided relief. I knew all I had to do was get home in one piece, and my wife would take care of me. I reached home, and soon thereafter, the dark energy stopped enveloping me.

A home is not a place, it's a person. That person is usually a woman. Mother, wife, aunt, sister, daughter, grandma, etc. This woman is our refuge, the one who will always make us feel wanted, cared for and loved unconditionally.

The Indian word for refuge, a safe and sheltered abode, is 'Ashrya'. We are where we belong, feel at home, and can rest peacefully without being judged or harassed.

Nearly all mothers possess this natural quality. To create a sense of emotional security, love and care. Similarly, almost all fathers provide that sense of physical and material security. If people are fortunate, they will discover the same traits in their spouse/partner.

Everyone needs that one person, and most of us always have or have had such a person in our lives. Unfortunately, many of us take them for granted and fail to appreciate the person who is probably the only reliable refuge in our lives. Then one day they are gone, and it's only then we sob and moan when we realise our neglect and folly in neither appreciating them nor reciprocating their love.

My parents have moved on, and my refuge is my wife, Mohini. One day, one of us too will not be there, leaving the other alone. I know the survivor will be emotionally handicapped without their refuge.

This is why Guru Tegh Bhadur ji says that all that is created must one day perish. However, there is only one true refuge that will always exist. That is the refuge of the Creator, if we choose to accept this fact.

God is not found in books or buildings, nor by rituals, nor parroting prayers, nor in assembling with the crowds. This refuge is discovered only by contemplation and meditation, for God is to be found only within our being.

That is, the one and only, our real home.

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