To remain happy in marriage
- Gurvinder Singh
- Jun 1, 2019
- 3 min read
Updated: Apr 13
In courtship, we make efforts to please our partner. In courtship, we make efforts to please our partner. To win our partner's affection and respect, we usually make an effort to be interesting, thoughtful, and attractive.
Whenever we try to be someone or something other than what we really are, we have to put on an act. Acting may be interesting and even entertaining, but it is usually quite exhausting.
We try very hard to live the unrealistic romantic dream, as depicted in romantic television serials, movies, novels, songs, poems, etc. Then, when we marry, we expect that life will be a dreamy fairy tale.
Love may be blind, but marriage is an eye-opener.
Marriage jolts people because we believe that once we have acquired our partner, we can stop pretending. The reality may still be beautiful, but we become unhappy because we think the partner has changed, whereas the partner has just reverted to being their 'normal' selves.
Is the reality bad, or are our expectations unrealistic? Each individual is a unique and strange creature, where the partner tries to make the other conform to their expectations, even if they are unrealistic. Nothing disappoints us more than unfulfilled expectations. We can choose to accept others as they are or to become unhappy.
It is the nature of human beings to be attracted to what we do not have over what we already possess. That is why we pursue people we cannot possess.
Anyone worth possessing simply cannot be possessed.
Each one of us is a unique and strange creature; however, that itself is our beauty. To accept that strangeness rather than trying to reform people to conform to our expectations is a key to happiness.
It is the nature of the sexes; Typically, men marry, thinking women will never change, but they do. Women believe the man will change, but men never change.
To remain happy, seek the goodness and beauty in others, while understanding and acknowledging our own flaws. Give more than we demand, just as we did during courtship, and we have a very good chance of being happy as individuals and as couples.
Management lesson:
What we learn in one sphere of our lives can easily and often be readily applied in other spheres of our lives.
People spend more time at work interacting with employers and employees than at home with their spouse or partner. In that sense, employment can often be like a marriage, where people are married to their job, meaning their organisation and their employer.
Though this article was written with discovering peace and happiness within marital relationships, it could be applied to a large extent for organisational building and employee satisfaction. This approach can be a foundation for building not only World-Class organisations but legendary institutions.
Written and Posted Originally: June 2019 Modified and Reposted : April 2026
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Yes you are absolutely right .. and I can see how special u make your wife feel everyday!!